I am having one of those days, overwhelmed and frustrated with this morning's turn of events that tears seem to be my only comforting release. Vibhu left late last night for Germany and after much deliberation and planning, I decided I would catch the train this evening for Delhi. I arrived at the Goreogon Station Passenger Reservation Counter by 8am hoping to beat the long queues that the train stations are notorious for, but of course, my arrival was superseded by at least 100 other people with the same idea. I filled out a reservation slip and got in line. Unfortunately I chose the line which gives senior citizens and people with physical disabilities the right to bypass all other waiting passengers and proceed directly to the front of the queue. I waited patiently for an hour before reaching the ticket counter, only to be unexpectedly informed that if I want to purchase a ticket under the Foreign Tourist quota (and therefore be guaranteed a seat since all other tickets had been filled and the waiting list was already over 150 people long)I'd have to go to Churchgate Station. Not Bandra, not Dadar, no Mumbai Central. But Churchgate, the last train station in Mumbai and over an hour from my current location. Devastated, I walked out of the reservation office. Determined to get one of the two remaining foreign tourist tickets on tonight's train to Delhi, I waited in another queue to purchase a ticket to Churchgate Station. By this time it was 9:20 am and the peak of rush hour on Mumbai's commuter trains. Trying to board a southbound train at this hour is absolutely suicidal. Each and every carriage bulged with people, men rode fearlessly on the tops of the carriages and hung precariously off the sides and rear. I tried once to board the ladies only carriage, pushing and fighting my way up to the train, only to watch a woman get trampled as she lost her footing. The train pulled away leaving behind a mob of 15 agitated women who weren't able to squeeze their way onto the train. I was among them. Still determined to get on a train, I tried for the First Class carriage on the next train that pulled into the station. But again, my determination wasn't strong enough to wrestle and push my way through the masses of Indian men trying to make their way to work. Frustrated and hungry I stopped by a concession stand for a samosa and mango juice. Big mistake. I've been dealing with intestinal cramping for the past few days, the kind that comes on so suddenly you find yourself lurching for a toilet, beads of sweat forming on your forehead as the urgency of the situation claws at you. I needed to get home. And so, after a difficult rickshaw ride home and a butt-clenching sprint up to Vibhu's flat, the contents of last night's dinner and this morning's train station snack emptied violently into the Indian-style squat toilet. As I washed my hands, I met my gaze in the mirror. Overwhelmed, frustrated, and defeated, tears rolled down my cheeks. And so here I am now, alone in Vibhu's flat, with no ticket to Delhi, hesitant to attempt traveling too far from home until my insides mellow out a bit, and with no one to talk to. I don't know what to do. I want my mom, I wish Vibhu was here, or Jen or Paula or Beatriz. I want a big hug from Michelle or my dad. I feel so weak and pathetic. What's my problem?!?
Ok, so I'm feeling better. It's about an hour later and after a good sob, a few bites of chocolate, and some comforting music, I've got my head on straight again. I'd go down to Churchgate Station, buy the ticket for Delhi and leave in the next day or two, but I'm running out of time. I need to be back in Mumbai on May 19, and with a minimum of 2 full days of travel just to get up to the northern towns that I want to visit to practice meditation and yoga, I'd be left with just enough time to enroll in a 10-day course before coming back to Mumbai. It's just too rushed. So, I'm going to explore a few more options available around Mumbai and stay here. I've tried on numerous occasions over the past few days to book a ticket out of Mumbai and each time I am faced with a new set of obstacles that has prohibited me from booking. I'm going to take that as a sign that I'm supposed to stay here. I'm going to quit fighting fate and just see what comes, one day at a time.
9 comments:
i wish i was there to hug you too! i know that frustrated, overwhelmed feeling all too well. miss you, be safe!
I'm sorry you're going through this! I wish I was there! But you're Dona Francis- you handle this type of thing better than anyone I know. You'll get through this and the rest of your travels. Then when you get home we'll have a big party and drink lots of California wine and eat yummy Davis restaurant food. Looking forward to it!
I wish I could be there and give you a hug my friend. I miss you so much and I hope that you are start to feel better soon. I'm thinking of you and hope to see you soon. I'll call you today when I leave work.
love you
Poor Dona! :-( Hang in there, bud. And thanks for posting that sort of thing, by the way. While it sucks to think of my friend having a hellish day halfway around the world, it's good to know that adventures are not always perfect and that sometimes life throws everyone a curve ball (even if you're Dona "Indiana Jones" Francis). :-) Take care, hang in there, and feel better soon!
HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!! These kind of days are oh so hard when you are not with any others. Here is a virtual hug @ I wish I was there to give you a big squeeze.
I am glad you feel a bit better. You have taken on something amazing girlfriend. You have done things I could only fantasize about - you are truly amazing - so PLEASE give yourself a break and take the time you need to get the "squirts" under control. Maybe a little alone time is what is needed right now and your body is telling you that. You will reach Dehli soon enough. You are always in my thoughts. I love you M
hey i am so sorry that you had to do that all alone there. i should have done that before leaving for germany. i wish i could just come back to wipe out your tears and give you a hug. But you are tuff and i believe in you that you will found your way. I ill be back soon
hugs
vibhu
My goodness, are you sure you're not in New YorkCity?
"They" say ya gotta even watch out for food washed in water.
I remember watching food being cooked in Mexico, saw the flames and felt the heat.
One of the only reasons to cook food is to sterilize it.
I just can't even imagine trying to travel while being sick.
Maybe hand sanitizer and pre packaged foods and drinks only for a while?
or drinks that have been boiled?..or with enuf ETOH to kill and cure?
Bacteria/toxins are one thing but parasitic is quite another.
Perhaps you can figure out the local folk medicie and procedures.
You've been there long enough so it's prob not simple digestive shock.
Take care, my dear.
Hang in there Dona. Like everyone said, you are tough and can handle this. I wish I was there with you...but know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love you
Dona,
I really can't say if this will help or not but picture your worse day back at work at CPNS and see if you would trade that for the adventure you are experiencing now. Somedays at work I find myself in tears in the bathroom and I long to be in a different place seeing the world. I guess I agree with what Mike said, it's good to be reminded that even adventurers such as yourself have bad days. Big hugs from me. I wish you happier days very soon.
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